


The slumber party

by dustenigmas



Series: What Marisa could have been [5]
Category: His Dark Materials (TV), His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
Genre: F/F, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Protectiveness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-02-24
Packaged: 2021-03-15 06:09:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29679606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dustenigmas/pseuds/dustenigmas
Summary: Marisa has trouble letting Lyra go to a slumber party. The fears of losing her daughter as well as the young daemon being exposed are stopping Lyra from having an ordinary childhood. Until Mary Malone interfered and encouraged Marisa to offer her daughter more freedom.
Relationships: Lyra Belacqua & Marisa Coulter, Lyra Belacqua & Mary Malone, Marisa Coulter & Mary Malone, Mary Malone & Marisa Coulter's Daemon
Series: What Marisa could have been [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2105424
Kudos: 23





	The slumber party

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! I hope you enjoy this one-shot!

Marisa and Lyra didn't have many arguments in the first few years they settled into the new world. They got along incredibly well, although they disagreed on some things, such as the freedom and autonomy that Lyra had asked for from a very young age. Considering whose daughter she was it was no surprise the girl proved to be curious, communicative, manipulative, and a liar. Qualities that Marisa greatly admired, when they were not applied to question her authority as a mother. 

Unfortunately, since Lyra moved to the new school, one focused on older children, the problems started. Marisa couldn't hide her displeasure at the friendships her daughter was developing, friendships that wanted Lyra to go out regularly to hang out and play at strangers' houses. This was something inconceivable to Marisa, she would not leave Lyra at the mercy of a stranger, of someone who could harm her little girl. 

"But all my friends are going to Annie's slumber party." Lyra begged her mother, she wanted to be able to attend the small parties her friends were attending. The little girl was always the only one who didn't go and it wasn't for lack of trying. 

The parents of Lyra's friends were always contacting Marisa, they were trying to give her the confidence to have the girl over. The phone calls were always unsuccessful, the woman was unyielding. The situation was so tragic that some parents even went to talk to the school teacher, in an attempt to get the lady to talk to Marisa and convince her to let their daughter have a normal childhood. 

Nonsense. Marisa stared at her daughter with her pitying eyes. As a mother, she was sorry to have to deprive Lyra of having a childhood like her friends, of being able to go out and sleep out without worrying about anything. She couldn't let that happen. 

"And how do you expect to hide Pan? How do you expect to control Pan's changes?" Marisa tried to bring some sense into her daughter. 

"I can control him at school." Lyra tried.

"No, you can't. We had to look for a school with lots of windows so he could stay outside. You told me yourself that one day Pan came in through the window and was flying around the room. Can you imagine if that happens in a closed room?" Marisa didn't want them to be exposed, it would only give them trouble fitting in. 

Mother and daughter had been in the new world for 10 years and they were still facing some adaptation problems, especially Lyra. The girl didn't understand why they had to come to this world, why people didn't have daemons, why she couldn't say where she came from, who her father was... These questions only increased as the years went by, curiosity was a typical characteristic of the girl, so Marisa's ready and rehearsed answers didn't satisfy her anymore. 

"That was once and it's been over a year now. All my friends are going, Mum. Please." Lyra was desperate. 

On TV, the little girl always watched how slumber parties, birthday parties, and friends' get-togethers were. She envied all those people who could attend and organize that kind of thing. Lyra could never call her friends for her birthday, she never went to one of their birthday parties. Her mother wouldn't let her. 

Pan said that Marisa wanted to have them all to herself, so she wouldn't let them go out and really connect with people other than her and Mary Malone. Lyra knew that wasn't true, even if she was sometimes influenced by Pan's words, she knew it was too risky to expose herself like that, but she needed to learn. They needed to grow up. The girl felt she was missing out on a lot. 

"You are not everyone. You're not like everyone else, Lyra." 

Lyra ran into the bedroom and shut the door tightly. The tantrum only infuriated Marisa, who preferred to leave her daughter quiet for a while, she knew how temperamental Lyra got when she didn't get something she wanted. The mother's heart ached for the suffering she saw in her daughter's eyes when she was prevented from going out with her friends and having a normal childhood. 

That very afternoon Annie's mother called Marisa, which was not unexpected. 

"Sorry, Lyra is accompanying me to a science congress on this very specific day. My wife and I have already planned to take her." Marisa used half-truths. Mary and she always took Lyra to congresses, but on the day of the slumber party there would be none - the congress would be two days later. 

"It will be the perfect time for you and your wife to have some private time. I don't mind hosting Lyra and letting her sleep here for a night or two. She and Annie are very good friends and I hear nothing but praise from your daughter." The voice on the other side of the phone tried.

"I'm sorry, but unfortunately, everything is already arranged. I don't believe it will be possible for Lyra to attend this time." 

"What about next time?"

"Well, a next time is a next time. Isn't it?"

"Marisa, you can't hold Lyra back. When she grows up she will become a liar just so she can go out with her friends, so she can enjoy some of the life that she's being deprived of. I understand that you and your wife are both reserved women, but Lyra needs to live, have friends and go out a little. I tell you that as a mother..."

"I know how I raise my daughter and what is best for her." Marisa hung up the phone angrily. 

The audacity of Annie's mother in criticizing the parenting she was giving Lyra crossed the line. Marisa had never lost her composure in a call before, but this time she demonstrated that she was angry. The golden monkey moved closer to Marisa, intending to offer some sort of comfort since he knew how she was feeling: angry and sad. Marisa needed to express her anger somehow, so she squeezed the fur on the golden monkey's back, causing pain to them both.

The woman was so engrossed in her own pain that she didn't notice that Mary had just arrived home. 

"Marisa? Honey, what is it?" Mary promptly questioned her. The scientist held out her arms to the golden monkey, who quickly moved into the newly arrived woman's lap. 

The golden monkey was always saved by Mary, especially at the beginning of Marisa and the scientist's relationship. Self-punitive behaviors were becoming rare in the couple's routine, but sometimes they still happened - usually on days that Marisa was in trouble or dealing with too much. 

"I heard an insinuation earlier... That I'm being a bad mother." Marisa tried to keep her tone of voice neutral, she didn't want to come across as too flustered.

Mary was shocked by Marisa's words. How could anyone say that the woman in front of her was a bad mother? The scientist knew about all the sacrifices she was making for Lyra. Marisa was the most devoted person to the little girl. Though she recognized that many times Marisa was too strict with Lyra's upbringing. 

The scientist saw every pain in Marisa's eyes, she saw the fear of not being enough. 

Mary pulled Marisa into a tight embrace. The golden monkey held onto the scientist's shoulder and allowed herself to touch Marisa's hair - a gesture that was not held back. 

"Why don't you tell me what happened? From the beginning." Mary asked as she held Marisa in her arms.

"Lyra asked me to sleep out... at a friend's house. A girl in her class is hosting a slumber party." 

"Oh! That's great, Marisa! Lyra turns out to be so sweet with the people in her class. We were afraid she wouldn't fit in, but it's quite the opposite."

Marisa disentangled herself from Mary's arms, the scientist didn't understand the point of the question. 

"Lyra won't sleep out. She can't."

"You don't think..."

"Lyra won't. I'm not going to risk her safety on a whim. Pan hasn't settled down and won't for a while. I would be irresponsible if I allowed something like that to happen." Marisa interrupted Mary.

"Are you doing this for Lyra's safety or because you don't want to stop having Lyra over your watch?" 

The question caught Marisa off guard. A part of her didn't want to take her eyes off Lyra, ever. It was already a problem with the girl going to school. At first, Marisa even considered taking some sort of position at the school so she could keep her eyes on Lyra - the idea was shot down by Mary, who claimed it was unreasonable. Deep down Marisa was afraid of losing Lyra, she saw on TV how mothers were left out of the picture as children grew up. That was one downside of this world: TV exposed their greatest fears. 

Of course one of the reasons Lyra didn't sleep out was that Marisa didn't want to share with anyone. Sometimes even Mary was targeted, she felt jealous of the relationship the scientist had with her daughter, especially when she was the first to know something about Lyra. 

"She's still too young to sleepovers." that was all Marisa could say. 

"What if we let Lyra spend the afternoon at Annie's house? How does that sound?" Mary tried. The scientist knew how much these discussions were making Lyra and Marisa's relationship worse, this would soon be unbearable. 

"No." 

"Marisa..."

"I said no. Lyra is still too young."

"You will damage your relationship with Lyra. She is a child who wants to have fun with her friends, she wants to go out to play and sleep at her friend's houses. As much as I love her dearly and love spending time with her, I'm not the best company right now. We are Lyra's mother figures, she sees us as someone to ask for advice, help, support... not to play with." 

"We play with her. We have a game night and..." 

"You know it's not the same thing. We're 30, Lyra's 10. That's the difference." Mary interrupted her wife. 

"And Pan? Do you really think they'll be able to control themselves?" Marisa used her last resort. 

Mary looked at Marisa with pity, she knew she was pushing her wife too hard. 

"I think she is her mother's daughter. You know she always gets what she wants. We raised her well. If Lyra thinks she gets it, then she gets it. In case she doesn't get it, we run after the damage later." 

Marisa turned her back on Mary, she knew the scientist was telling the truth. The downside of raising Lyra with Mary's help was that the scientist also had a decision-making role. Her daughter had been shared with the scientist since they arrived in the new world. 

That night, silence predominated in the house. Everyone was afraid of what to say. They were all lost in their own thoughts. Especially Lyra, the girl hated to fight with her mother and knew that at some point they would have to talk. 

It was only when the women went to put Lyra to sleep that a few words were spoken by the scientist. Mary praised Lyra's drawings and said she wanted to introduce her to the new students she had started mentoring that year.

"I'm calling Annie's mother tomorrow." Marisa surprised both her daughter and wife. 

The scientist and Lyra stopped talking. 

"You can spend the afternoon at Annie's house, but you're not sleeping there." Marisa had barely finished speaking and she felt Lyra's arms wrap around her. Her daughter was so happy. 

Pan turned into a wildcat and jumped up on the bed, he purred and did a few playful strokes on Lyra's leg. 

"Marisa...?" Mary was overjoyed at her wife's decision. The scientist would never override a decision by Marisa, no matter how much they both raised Lyra and shared the responsibility. The final word was the woman with the golden monkey.  


"You have to control Pan. I'll take you to and from Annie's house and hope you're on your best behavior." Marisa whispered. 

"Thank you, mother. I'm so happy! Thank you!" Lyra was beaming, as was Mary. 

Marisa looked at the happiness reflected in Lyra and Mary's eyes, she knew she had done the right thing. But that didn't stop her from feeling suffocated, she wasn't ready yet to let Lyra be free, to let her daughter be the master of her own life. She needed to try, and she was trying. 

Small steps. 

"Can't I sleep at Annie's too?" 

"LYRA! Don't push it, girl." Mary teased the girl, but with seriousness in her tone. It was not a good idea to push Marisa to the limit. It had already been a chore to talk to Marisa about the idea of Lyra going to Annie's house for the afternoon.

"It wouldn't hurt to try." Lyra shrugged. 

Marisa laughed. 

"Good night, dear. Sleep well." Her mother deposited a love-laden kiss on Lyra's forehead. 

Marisa's heart was both happy and sad. Happy because her daughter was lovable and belonged to her. Sad because she was growing up and soon Marisa would no longer be the center of her life. 

The golden monkey took advantage of the nice mood to tease Marisa in thought, he said that their work with Lyra was just beginning because soon she would have boyfriends. That was enough for Marisa to leave her daughter's room and end the day. One step at a time.

**Author's Note:**

> Don't forget to leave kudos if you liked it! That's very motivating. You can also suggest ideas for the next one-shot. 
> 
> and don't forget to check out my other works!


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